Impostor Syndrome: How to Deal with the Self-Sabotage That Is Preventing Your Success
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Have you ever achieved an incredible result, received praise, recognition… and felt like it was pure luck? As if, somehow, you were fooling everyone and it was just a matter of time before they found out you weren't "all that"? Well, that's the world of Impostor Syndrome.
This silent feeling affects thousands of people, especially women, sensitive, empathetic professionals who hold themselves to extremely high standards. And the most curious thing? Generally, these people are precisely the most competent. But the mind tells a different story.
Let's understand why this happens and, most importantly, how to reprogram this pattern of self-sabotage, so that you feel worthy of the success you build every day.
What is Imposter Syndrome?
Imposter Syndrome is the persistent perception that your success is undeserved, even in the face of concrete evidence of competence. The person believes they are deceiving others and fears being “discovered” at any moment.
Although it is not a mental disorder recognized in the DSM-5 (psychiatric manual), it has a real impact on self-esteem, motivation and emotional health.
“Imposter syndrome is when a person feels that their success is not legitimate and believes they are deceiving others, even though they are competent.”
Where does it come from? The emotional and social roots of self-sabotage
The syndrome has deep roots. It often begins in childhood. Thus, the cause may be related to overly demanding environments, parents who only valued high grades, a lack of emotional validation, among others. It then gains strength in adulthood, when we enter competitive environments or environments marked by unattainable standards of perfection.
Furthermore, the social landscape plays a crucial role. Women, Black people, LGBTQIA+ people, and other minorities often face environments where they have to prove twice as much to receive half as much recognition. Consequently, this fuels feelings of fraudulence.
The 5 Most Common Types of Impostors
Researchers have identified distinct profiles among people with the syndrome. Knowing yours can help deactivate the pattern. The main ones are:
- Perfectionist: You never feel like you've done enough.
- Natural Genius: You think you have to get everything right the first time.
- Expert: Always feel like you need to study more before acting.
- Soloist: He doesn't ask for help because he thinks it's a sign of weakness.
- Superhero: She believes she needs to handle everything — and alone.
How Impostor Syndrome Affects Your Professional and Personal Life
At work, it can lead to procrastination due to fear of making mistakes, overexertion to compensate for insecurity, and difficulty accepting promotions or praise. On the other hand, in personal life, it manifests as low self-esteem, difficulty relating to others, and a constant fear of not being enough.
Sometimes it prevents you from applying for that dream job or charging a fair price for your services. And, worse, you may not even realize you're sabotaging yourself.
The relationship between the syndrome and self-sabotage
Self-sabotage is the act of creating unconscious obstacles to your own progress. And impostor syndrome is one of the most subtle and dangerous forms of this.
In this sense, it makes you:
- Reject opportunities for fear of “not being ready”
- Compare yourself to others all the time
- Be wary of genuine compliments
- Compulsively seek external approval
“Imposter syndrome is a form of self-sabotage, as it leads people to turn down opportunities, doubt their abilities, and downplay legitimate achievements.”
Positive Psychology: The Antidote to Self-Deprecation
Positive Psychology teaches that it's not enough to eliminate what's wrong—you need to cultivate what strengthens you. In other words, you don't just need to "stop sabotaging yourself," but learn to recognize your strengths, talents, and virtues.
Practices such as writing down three daily achievements, identifying your character strengths (such as courage, empathy, or creativity) and celebrating small victories creates a domino effect of self-validation.
As the Mindfulness can help break this cycle
Mindfulness — or mindfulness — helps slow down automatic thoughts. By bringing your attention to the present moment, you learn to observe these sabotaging internal dialogues without becoming confused by them.
Quick exercise of mindfulness:
Take a deep breath. Observe your breathing for 1 minute, paying attention. If you can't concentrate, that's okay. Be kind to yourself, and try again. Then, when a sabotaging thought arises, such as: “This is a waste of time, I'm not doing it right.”, just say mentally: "Thought". And come back to the present. This trains the brain not to identify with the inner critic.
What usually happens:
When a thought arises—like "you're not good enough or good enough" or "everything's going to go wrong"—we tend to automatically believe that thought, without questioning it. This way, it becomes an absolute truth and begins to generate emotion, tension, anxiety, fear...
What mindfulness proposes:
Instead of fighting the thought or letting it get the better of you, you simply observe it as a passing mental event. In other words, you acknowledge it: “That’s just a thought.”
In this way, mentally saying “thought"As soon as the sabotaging thought arises, it creates a space of awareness between you and the mental content. And so, you remember that: “Thought is not reality. It is just a content of my mind at this moment.”
NLP techniques to reprogram your inner dialogue
Auditory submodality:
NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) allows us to change repetitive mental patterns. Therefore, we have several techniques that can be used in the case of impostor syndrome. One of the most effective is changing the submodality auditory:
- If the critical inner voice has a serious, grave tone, imagine it being spoken in a cartoon voice.
- Repeat the inner critic, but now in a Donald Duck voice. The result? The weight of the criticism dissolves, and you regain control.
Anchoring:
Another powerful feature is the anchoring — associate a gesture (like squeezing two fingers) with a memory of success and security. This activates this state when doubt arises.
It seems like magic, but it's applied neuroscience: our brain is an association machine. Just as a song can remind you of an old love (and feel it all over again), you can deliberately install “positive triggers” in your body and mind.
“Anchoring is the process of associating a sensory stimulus (a gesture, sound, image, or touch) with a specific emotional state, so that, by repeating that stimulus, the desired state is automatically reactivated.”
Anchoring exercise:
- Choose the desired emotional state:
It could be confidence, security, calm, motivation — any state that counteracts impostor syndrome. - Recall a real experience where you felt this intensely:
Close your eyes and relive that moment as if it were happening now. Feel, see, and hear every detail. - At the peak of emotion, apply a specific physical stimulus:
For example, press your thumb and index finger together, touch the left side of your wrist, or make a unique fist. This stimulus is your anchor. - Repeat the process with different similar memories:
This strengthens the anchor, making it more reliable. - Test the anchor:
In a neutral or mildly stressful moment, activate the gesture. This way, you should feel an almost immediate emotional shift.
Why does it work so well against Impostor Syndrome?
Because impostor syndrome is, essentially, a conditioned emotional state: a set of sensations, thoughts, and reactions that arise automatically when faced with certain triggers, such as a compliment, a new responsibility, or professional visibility.
This way, by using anchoring, you're installing a new emotional shortcut in your brain. That is, instead of falling into a pattern of doubt, you activate confidence.
Bonus tip: Combine with conscious breathing
When activating your anchor, do 3 deep, conscious breathsThis enhances the effect and anchors the gesture in your physical body, creating an even more integrated response.
Practical Strategies for Recognizing and Dealing with Imposter Syndrome
- Evidence Diary: write down your achievements, positive feedback and achievements.
- Reinterpret the errors: every failure is a lesson, not a sentence.
- Talk to mentors: hearing from someone experienced that you are on the right path helps to dispel doubts.
- Don't wait for confidence to act: confidence comes with action, not before it.
Confidence phrases for when doubt arises
- “If I got here, it wasn’t by chance — it was through effort.”
- “I don’t need to be perfect to be excellent.”
- “Being vulnerable doesn’t make me weak, it makes me human.”
- “The success I have is legitimate, and I am worthy of it.”
- “I may not know everything, but I am always learning.”
“To deal with impostor syndrome, repeat phrases like: 'The success I have is legitimate and I am worthy of it.'”
What to do when fear of failure paralyzes you
Breathe. Identify the fear. Ask yourself, "What's the worst-case scenario? What's the best-case scenario?" Fear often loses its power when it's clearly illuminated.
Remember: no one has absolute control. Failure, when viewed as experience, is a natural part of the growth process.
When to seek help: therapy, support groups, and integrative programs
If the syndrome begins to impact your mental health, self-esteem, or important decisions, it's time to seek support. Cognitive behavioral therapy, NLP- and Positive Psychology-based programs (such as Mindset Reprogramming), and therapy groups can all help.
Conclusion: The life you want is beyond doubt.
Imposter Syndrome doesn't define who you are. After all, it's just a voice—loud, insistent, but misguided. So, the deeper you delve into self-knowledge, the more you discover that your worth never depended on the validation of others.
Above all, you deserve to be where you are. And you deserve to go even further.
FAQ – Frequently Asked Questions about Impostor Syndrome
1. What is impostor syndrome?
It's the persistent feeling that your success is undeserved, even when there is evidence of competence.
2. How do I know if I have this syndrome?
If you feel like you're "tricking" people, doubt your achievements, and avoid challenges for fear of failure, you may be dealing with it.
3. Is there a cure for impostor syndrome?
Although there is no “cure,” it is possible to overcome it with self-knowledge, Positive Psychology practices, Mindfulness, NLP, and, if necessary, therapy.
4. Mindfulness does it really help in these cases?
Yes. Mindfulness helps you recognize and slow down self-critical thoughts, breaking the cycle of self-sabotage.
5. What is the first step in dealing with the syndrome?
Recognize it. Then, practice self-compassion and seek practical tools to change your internal dialogue.
Image: Freepik
Marcel Castilho is an expert in neuromarketing, neuroscience, mindfulness and positive psychology. In addition to being an advertiser, he also has a Master's degree in NLP – Neurolinguistic Programming. As the owner and founder of the communications agency VeroCom and also of the digital agency Vero Contents, he has been studying human behavior for over 30 years.
